Perfect Sorrow
by TheCleanWriter
Summary: Perfect happiness ruined Angel's life, but what would happen after perfect sorrow? What if Buffy had seen Angelus outside of her window upon hearing of Miss Calendar's death? And how do the Oracles play a part in this? Set after the episode "Passion". Possible one-shot. BuffyxAngel


**Disclaimer: I do NOT own Buffy the Vampire Slayer or anything else affiliated with the show. I'm only borrowing them from Joss and promised to return them after.**

**Chapter One: "Good Morning"**

Buffy sat down on the floor, sliding her back down the wall. Her eyes were frozen to a spot on the floor. She felt as if she couldn't breathe, like a ton of bricks had just been dumped onto her chest. The sobs of her mother and best friend were muffled from her ears.

She had just gotten off the phone with Giles. He had barely been able to speak. Jenny Calendar, Giles's girlfriend, was murdered tonight. The police have no clue who did it, but the Scoobies did. Angelus. The Scourge of Europe.

He had left a sketch of Jenny laying on Giles's bed, her neck bent at an unnatural angle. They were all taking it pretty hard, especially Giles. _Of course,_ Buffy thought, _I_ _know if someone had just snapped my boyfriend's neck, I'd be crushed._ Although, a similar situation had recently happen to her.

One moment of perfect happiness and BAM! Her once sweet, brooding, ensouled vampire boyfriend became a psychotic, torture-loving killing machine. Why did all this have to happen? Why did people have to die? Why did soul binding curses have to have loopholes?

Why couldn't life just be even a little bit easier?

* * *

Angelus stood there, a smirk plastered on his face as he stared through the closed window into the Summers' home. Buffy was on the floor, her face frozen in despair. Her pain only increased the pleasure he was feeling about this whole situation. He had just wished he could've been there to witness Giles's reaction to his dead lover. That, however, surely would have been suicide. Even with inhuman strength, he would be no match for a man who's lover had just been brutally murdered with several crossbows nearby.

He couldn't be there, no, but the look on Buffy's face was somewhat enough to fill the void. Angelus breathed in a deep, unnecessary breath of cold air and smiled wickedly. The Scourge of Europe was back in business and he wasn't going lose his soul again. Nothing could stop him now.

Not even that stupid, blond Slayer.

* * *

After what felt like hours, yet had only been a few minutes, Buffy finally looked up from the spot her eyes had been burning holes into the floor. Willow and Joyce were still hugging tightly as Willow sobbed into the older woman's shoulder.

Buffy's hand reached up to her wet face to wipe away the tears she hadn't realized she'd shed. Was this all really happening? Miss Calendar really couldn't be dead, could she? And by the hands of the love of her life? Well, his body anyway, not his soul.

She tore her eyes off the two crying women and stared out the window into the night. Was this all a dream? No, not a dream, a nightmare. As her eyes scanned across the night sky, her eyes skimmed over a familiar face…Angel.

No. This was not her Angel, this was a demon. Angel was gone. This was Angelus. Angelus killed Jenny. Angelus broke their hearts. Angelus deserved to die. There was nothing left of her devoted boyfriend now, just an empty shell of a monster in his place.

Buffy's lip curled as a soft, whispered snarl escaped her lips. She slowly rose to her feet and ducked out of the house, unnoticed by the two grief-ridden women. She proceeded towards the person she had seen through the window, her footsteps silent against the damp grass.

There he stood. Angelus. He looked like a statue, frozen in time as he stared at the two remaining grievers in the home.

"Well. Look who finally wised up and found me." He taunted, not tearing his eyes away from the window. Buffy glared at him. Her heart felt as cold as ice, as if she were the soulless vampire right then, not him.

"Angelus." She replied darkly, ignoring his snarky remark. His head snapped towards her in surprise. Her voice had sounded so dark, so angry, so_ heartless_.

"Whoa. Did Slayer go out and lose her pesky little soul as well?" He asked snidely, beginning to walk in a wide circle around her. Her head didn't moved but her eyes followed him, fists clenched tightly. "Because, let me just say: I'd like that very, very much." He purred softly into her ear.

Buffy whipped around and smacked him hard across the face, causing him to stagger backwards, mostly out of shock. Angelus's hand rose to his cheek as he stared at her with an amused look on his face.

"What happened to the soul's gushy, lovey dovey girlfriend? And where have _you_ been these past few centuries?" He smirked. Her face remained as hard as stone. Nothing Angelus could ever say would get through her thick shell.

_This is not my Angel._

_This is a monster._

_A killer._

_A demon._

_And killer demons deserved to die._

"What happened to me?" She finally asked. Angelus leaned back a little in curiosity. "She left the same time you took over her boyfriend." Her voice was murderous, and the vampire had caught onto her tone.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Okay, Buff. Slow down. Let's just be calm about this…" He started, holding his hands in the air as he slowly moved backwards, away from her. A stake slid down from her jacket sleeve and into her hand. Her eyes remained on him in an intense glare.

"No." Her voice boomed, causing him to freeze mid-retreat. "I'm done talking."

She stalked a wide circle around him, both of them feeling as if the predator was slowly turning into the prey and vice versa. He turned, watching her every move as she circled around him.

"You see, I've been holding back. Not intentionally, of course. I mean, a Slayer dating a vampire definitely has its downfalls sometimes, especially when that vampire goes and loses his soul. So when that does tend to happen, it gets kind of hard to do my usually slaying." She explained. His eyes began widening as he realized the tone she was speaking in. How she spoke. It was just like he had to all his victims in centuries past.

"But then it hit me! The only thing that's kept your heart away from the end of my stake was your face. All I saw was the face of my Angel. But Angel wouldn't do this." She continued, waving her hand through the air. "Which can only mean one thing: My Angel is gone. And all that's left is the shell of a demon. Which reminds me, I like to slay those." If Angelus's heart had been beating, it would've stopped. He knew the only thing keeping him alive from the Slayer was his face. Buffy couldn't kill Angel, soul or no soul. But that didn't seem to be to his advantage anymore.

"C'mon, Buff. That annoying soul is still buried in here somewhere. I can feel him. Wish I couldn't, but hey, nothing's perfect. Just remember, sweetheart, get rid of me and you get rid of any chance you'd ever have of getting your boy back." He said, almost pleading.

Quick as a flash she slapped him again, this time a metal ring on her hand catching his cheek, scraping him just enough to draw a little blood. He staggered back again. "What is this, slap the vampire day?!" He yelled as he lightly dabbed at the blood trickling down his cheek with his fingers.

"Don't you call me 'sweetheart'." She growled. Angelus huffed in defeat. "There is no chance of Angel coming back. I told you. He's gone. _Gone_. Now because you're the only thing left, let me say this one thing…" She stepped closer, stabbing her pointer finger hard into his chest as she stared icily into his eyes.

"_I. Hate. You._" For a moment, they stared at each other. Buffy, without taking her eyes off him, slid a small, metal ring off her finger. His eyes briefly flickered down to look at it: A claddagh ring. It had a small smear of blood on the edge of it. That was what had been used to cut his cheek. "I loved Angel. _Loved._ Past tense. That's gone now. All because he is too. I don't love you. I _despise_ you. So driving a stake through your heart won't be a problem now." She finished.

She pounded the ring into his chest and drew back her stake. His eyes widened but he let the ring drop to the ground beneath them as his hand flew forward to grabbed onto her wrist, inches before the stake penetrated his flesh. They continued to struggle, but her fury only fed her strength, inching the pointed end closer and closer. A flash of light suddenly surrounded him, causing a scream of agony to escape his throat.

* * *

_"Angelus."_ A male voice whispered. The vampire looked around, desperate to find the source of the voice, but all he could see was white.

"Who's there?"

"_Brother, it is not Angelus anymore."_ A woman's voice whispered to the male, ignoring Angel's question. He stared down at his hands and flipped them around. He was back. He was really back! The female voice gigged softly.

_"Yes, Champion. Your soul has been restored."_ She replied softly. Angel looked up and smiled. He still couldn't see the source of the voices, but that didn't matter. All that mattered was that he was back. He was home. Buffy was his home.

"But…but how?" He stuttered. This time, the male voice responded.

"_Perfect happiness was all it took to remove your soul. After centuries, you managed to achieve it. Perfect sorrow was all it took to restore it."_ He whispered back. Angel shook his head as Angelus's memories continued to flood back to him.

"When Buffy told me she didn't love me…that she hated me….Sure, she was talking to Angelus, but being in his body, seeing through his eyes, it felt as if those words were directed at me…it was….horrible." He shuddered, remembering the encounter.

_"At that moment, how did you feel?"_ Whispered the female voice. He sighed, sitting down on the white floor as he buried his face into his hands.

"At that moment,…I wouldn't have hesitated to walk into the sunset. Not a doubt in my mind. I would have walked straight into the sun and burned. Death would've been a great relief from her words. I would've rather driven a stake through my own heart." He replied grimly, his voice barely audible.

_"Perfect sorrow. You would've given up your life in an instant from your sorrow. Nothing else could compare to hearing the love of your life say those words to your face, even if it wasn't to you."_ The male whispered. Unshed tears glistened in Angel's eyes. "_Surely you had to know about it. If there was a loophole to losing your soul, there had to also be one for gaining it. Perfect opposites: Happiness and sorrow."_

Angel scoffed. "What's with you people and perfection?" The female voice giggled again while the male voice let out an annoyed grunt. A thought suddenly occurred to him, causing his head to snap back up from out of the shelter of his hands.

_"No, Champion. Perfect happiness will never come into affect again._" The female voice reassured him. His jaw dropped in amazement before melting into a smile at her words. _It's like they can read my mind!_ He thought.

_"We can."_ The male voice whispered in a bored tone. Bewilderment clouded his face once again.

"_You see, Champion, you are only hearing our thoughts to you. We are not present. You are in a separated state. Your mind here while your body remains on Earth."_ The female whisper clarified. Angel nodded slowly.

"And you brought me here to explain to me the restoration of my soul?" He asked.

"_Precisely!" _She whispered excitedly. He nodded again as more and more things began to make sense to him.

"But why this sudden change in curse? The happiness clause is gone forever?" He asked. Could it really be? Could he and Buffy finally have a chance to be together? Sure, he'd never really be able to give her children or grow old with her, but this was a step farther than where they were before, right? The male voice sighed as if Angel was not understanding an incredibly simple concept.

_"Yes. You've achieved your perfect happiness and gone through achieving perfect sorrow. It is not needed to be gone through again. You've fulfilled your curse. Your soul is now bound_ _to you, Champion."_ He answered. A large grin spread across Angel's face.

"Now that that's all cleared up, can I go back to my body now?" He asked, wanting more than ever to be back to Earth.

_"There is one catch…."_ The female oracle drawled. Angel's smile dropped.

"_Sister, do not frighten him. The catch is that you will be put back in time to the point you had lost your soul. This time, no soul will be lost and life will continue on."_ The male finished, chastising his sister. Angel's smile slowly began to reappear.

"All those things I did, deaths I caused, won't have ever happened?" He asked, happiness etched into his voice. If he could see the voices, he knew they'd be nodding.

"_That is correct, Champion."_ Whispered the female voice happily.

"Oh, yeah. Before I go, answer me one more thing. Why do you keep calling me champion?" Angel asked, puzzled. They had only used his real name once, besides calling him Angelus.

"_Our apologies, Champi-ehm, Angel. __You see, my brother and I are Oracles. We see the past, present and future. We are not at liberty to discuss…but do not worry, your Shanshu will come soon."_ The female voice answered. Angel quirked an eyebrow. _Shanshu? What the heck was a Shanshu?_

"_Enough, sister!"_ the male voice boomed. The female let out a frustrated grunt before speaking to Angel again. "_You may go now, Champion. Be with your Slayer. And remember, keep her safe."_ He nodded firmly.

"Always." He replied before light flashed around him again.

* * *

His eyes snapped open. He was there, back in his apartment, staring at the ceiling. Something warm stirred next to him. He turned his head to find a sleeping Buffy. A soft smile tugged at his lips as he watched the sheets covering her bare chest rise and fall.

Carefully, so he wouldn't wake her, he pressed his lips against her forehead for a brief moment. His gentle attempts, however, still managed to wake her up. Her eyes slowly fluttered open as she let out a contented sigh, looking up at him.

"Good morning." She chirped softly. He smiled at her, chuckling softly. He finally got it. A morning with the love of his life. His smile widened as he glimpsed at the metal claddagh ring on her finger. He leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on her soft lips.

"Good morning."

* * *

**So this was meant to be a quick little one-shot of what I think what would have happened if Buffy had actually looked out the window and seen Angelus outside.**

**Obviously the Powers That Be/Oracles had to be involved in binding Angel's soul.**

**Perfect sorrow. Really, how was that not a thing? It just makes so much sense! Perfect happiness and he loses his soul. Opposite of perfect happiness would be something like perfect sorrow, which would help him regain himself right? Sounds legit.**

**I really wanted them to say "I love you" to each other, but "Good morning" sounded like the perfect ending. And hey, I worked in a Buffy/Angel kiss! And the ring! Which is my favorite present Angel has ever given her.**

**Now, obviously with his soul bound, he wouldn't have left for LA so the Powers That Be would have just found someone else to fulfill the role. But with all the battles and apocalypses in Sunnydale, Angel could still achieve his champion status and get a shot at his Shanshu. Plus, I couldn't stand Spuffy or Riley so Angel staying just kicks them out of the picture entirely.**

**And for the whole Oracles whispering when they were talking part, they weren't actually there with him, so of course their voices wouldn't be very loud.**

**So let me know what you think! :)**

**Btw, my birthday was yesterday, so every review is a birthday wish! :)**

**Thanks! ReViEw! rEvIeW!**

**-TheCleanWriter**


End file.
